Mood:  happy

How to Treat a Lady

Now, coming from me this will seem a bit odd. I’m not really a cold fish but my actions in the past said otherwise. There were, at the time, many issues. All of these have been cleared up. I honestly do prefer being close. I love hugs. What happened and why doesn’t matter because what I am writing below are my true beliefs.

All women are ladies. Some are just a bit rough around the edges. But even they deserve respect because respect given is respect returned. Respect is not however, gender specific. It’s amazing the world that opens up with please and thank you. A simple act of opening a door often earns a thank you or a smile.

Let’s look at some of the basics and misconceptions. At the top of the list and paramount, housework is NOT women’s work. You live there, help. If you don’t know how to do something, ask politely. You don’t know how to cook? Either do the dishes or learn basic skills. She will teach you. Ask her how she does laundry, then help. You bought her that sexy outfit, now learn how to hang it up or what drawer it goes in.

For the woman of your dreams, wife or girlfriend, learn to give gentle hugs. A loving touch does wonders. She’s working around the house? Step up behind her and give her a quick hug and tell her how you feel but make it something positive. Hug her whenever you can. Show her you really care. I learned this lesson the hard way. I made a vow to never not give all the hugs I can. Now if that isn’t a convoluted sentence! Hug her often!

Probably the most important lesson to learn is listen, then talk. She has things to say that are important. Her day is stressful and busy also. Share equally the events that transpire away from each other. Everything she has to say is just as important as what you do, listen to her. You might be surprised and actually learn something. Whatever you do, do not underestimate or put down the women in your life. They are as much a part of this world as you.

I could go on and write a book about this (maybe I will), but these are the basics. I’ve made many of these mistakes and I’ve learned from them. Use this as a guide. It really will make your life better.

Posted by theessaywriter at 1:53 PM CDT

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Mood:  happy

Biting the Bullet

Some things in life are more important than others. All that is truly important in my life is sealed with a promise. Each of these is, at the very least, an oath between God and myself. I have recently made several promises and these will be kept. I finally wised up and listened to a very intelligent expert. But now, one more promise. This will be the most difficult.

I promise to quit smoking.

Posted by theessaywriter at 1:41 PM CDT

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Mood:  happy

A Tribute to Three Greats

Writing can be a tough career choice. But when you have help, it does go a bit easier. This will be short, but these three really deserve all the accolades they can get.

We’ll start with one that seems to always be going. You’d think that eventually there would be an end! At least laying down at night seems to help because first thing in the morning our first candidate is ready to go.

Number two on the list is all over the place. The variety of output never ceases to amaze me. I often wonder when candidate two will ever put a cap on the work. All the words flow out like the colors of the rainbow.

On the list at position three is a character quite unlike any other. Where do the ideas come from? There must be a miniature file cabinet in there someplace. The output is prodigious! Daily you see something coming out of candidate three.

There you have it my three tributes without which my writing career would hardly exist. Yes, it’s true. I need candidate one, my legal pads, but it takes candidate two, my pens to bring out the words and candidate three, JP, my stuffed, lavender puppy that is my muse personified.

Posted by theessaywriter at 12:58 AM CDT

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Mood:  happy

I must put this in to explain much of what I have written. Whether the writing is good or bad, is irrrelevant. The purpose of many of these most recent posts was cathartic. I needed the emotional release. I am sorry for the negativity, but I had to get it out of my system.

The post below this one is the first of what will only be positive posts from this point forward. Again, accept my apology for the negativity.

ron

Posted by theessaywriter at 2:15 PM CDT

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Mood:  happy

A Writers View

My very survival has always depended on the words I use. The sharpest attacks, the most vicious blows could be deflected. I needed no pen for I learned early the art of verbal repartee. Putting the words to a more permanent and visual form, on paper, was never considered. A writer? Me? Not likely.

I have read Dickens and Hemmingway. The books of Steinbeck I devoured. I am not in that league. I wrote but one lengthy treatise in college. It fared quite well. I wrote a story and it was enjoyed by one person. A Writer? That takes talent.

Talent. How ironic. The words that were my survival and strength are my talent. I put pen to paper less than three years ago. I shared them over the Internet. I learned from the experts, the talented authors that I am indeed a writer. I’ve heard from the best, Joyce Anthony (author of Storm), Marvin Wilson (I romanced the Stone, Owen Fiddler), and so many more that would take a book to list. I learned that not only am I a writer, but a good one at that.

I am on the verge of making my name known in the writing world. You see above a pair of excellent writers. Each is different in style. My way is unique to me. I’ve never had the confidence I need. But I also have some great people that have believed in me. I now have the confidence to believe in myself. With that confidence, I move forward. I can do it.

Posted by theessaywriter at 2:14 PM CDT

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Mood:  crushed out

Life in the Dead Zone

The maelstrom that is my life has gone from bad to hell on earth. The language used in this treatise is not done for effect but is instead meant in its most literal form. There may be none, we shall see.

I thought I had lived a decent life. I did not use drugs, nor believed in violence. What then went wrong? I existed on the surface of the me that covered a dark and foreboding secret. The me I portrayed fed off this secret and drove everyone away.

This secret, this basis of the anger upended my emotional state. The me that I want to be is not the me I display. The me that is seen destroys all relationships. My life has been and is, very empty. This emotional firestorm finally flashed over and destroyed the one true relationship. I, at this point, see not a rescue. The fires will abate but it leaves behind a charred and destroyed shell of humanity.

Posted by theessaywriter at 7:41 AM CDT

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Mood:  crushed out

Is it Possible?

Is it really possible to recover some semblance of happiness after a devastating loss? From my point of view, I don’t see it. Then I am supposed to just forget my past? Forget those that meant everything? That kind of family, that kind of love comes along but once a lifetime.

Is it possible to forgive an emotionally destroyed old fool? No, I don’t think so. Nothing is salvageable. The emotions are horribly mangled, nothing can repair them. Why can’t they just be shut down? They are only trouble. Why me? Why did this emotional firestorm target me? that cyclonic vortex has sucked me into the bowels of hell. Is it really possible for this black hole of emotional ineptitude to change colors?

Posted by theessaywriter at 12:44 AM CDT

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Mood:  don't ask

Wasted

A lifetime gone. Years of existence spent on self-destruction. No drugs, no alcohol, no violence was needed. God gave me life. I gave it meaninglessness. Failure was not an option. It was and is, a fact. Six decades wasted. No love survived my presence.

I destroyed myself. The emotional hell that was and is, me put all around asunder. No job, no relationship, survives my emotional onslaught. All that I could have been, never was. No one, myself included, can be around me and walk away whole. I am fragmented pile of invalid humanity. Six relationships, six failures. A lifetime wasted.

This is not a self-destruct prophecy. It may be an escape mechanism. I know not to where since nowhere am I wanted. All that meet me in person shun me. I wear a cloak seeped in disaster. What it covers I know not. Is there a core, a seed worthy of salvation? This begs the question of, is, there any prayer of a future? With the history of emotional degradation, no chance exists for a future relationship. I have wasted, nay, destroyed, shattered, all dreams. I no longer have a chance at love, or a relationship. My declining years shall fade to dark and everyone’s relief.

Posted by theessaywriter at 9:05 AM CDT

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Mood:  happy

Self Esteem

“I am worthless. I’ve been around a long time and look what I have to show for it, nothing. I’m surprised my mirror hasn’t shattered from my ugliness. I am as dumb as a pile of rocks.”

Does this sound familiar? Do you hear yourself saying this? I did. But the bottom line is, you’re wrong. You may be right about being around a long time, but the rest of that statement is total rubbish.

If you have children and friends, you have accomplished something. No friends? Would you want to be around someone who is always negative like that? I didn’t think so. Look at what you are good at and put your focus there.

You’re ugly? Who says so? You? Don’t listen to the low opinions from others. You are good looking. You may not be model material but good looking nonetheless,

How dumb are you? If you can read, you can learn. Read, talk to others, but learn. Do not let your intelligence or lack of it, bring you down.

Look at yourself closely. Yes, there are some parts that aren’t the greatest, but forget about them. Put those out of your mind. Only focus on what there is about you that is good. If it’s hard, then just start with the little things and work up. You can do it, and you must!

Posted by theessaywriter at 2:01 PM CDT

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Mood:  happy

Let’s Talk Abuse

“Why is Kara so quiet? Last year I could barely shut her up.”

This is a situation that occurs all too frequently. It is not always abuse and even when it is, it goes unreported. Children are easily intimidated and most of the time it is a fellow family member as the source. Report the abuse and you’ll lose this happy home, or life. This abuser or set of abusers must be stopped, but how do you convince a child? How many years will this trauma haunt her or him? When it comes to child abuse, gender does not come into play.

What can be done? Ask questions, talk to this child, to his/her friends. The signs of abuse are not always visible. Trust what the child says but listen closely. There will be hints of truth, either in the words or tone of voice. Only when abuse is strongly suspected should authorities be contacted. Granted that police, medical personnel, and social services must be involved. But bringing in authority figures and no abuse is detected, this family will be forever marked. This instills a stigma that is hard to escape.

Or the obverse is to do nothing. Now the abused child has little chance. The abuse will continue. If he/she lives through this, they will be traumatized, scarred, for life. This also is a future abuser. It happened to them, it must be the way life really is. Only a fraction of these survivors seek help.

A few abused do seek help. Listen to their stories. It is from them that we learn the signs. We learn how to tell abuse from normal discipline. It is up to everyone to stamp out this plague called child abuse.

Posted by theessaywriter at 1:22 PM CDT

Updated: Saturday, 16 August 2008 1:22 PM CDT

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